Dating Advice for Women: Expectations vs. Reality

By:Devon September 25, 2012 at 9:37 am

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Anyone in a relationship for a substantial period of time likely understands that sometimes a rift can form between expectations and reality.

In order to apply this experience to new relationships, you need to embrace the following dating advice for women; do not apply unrealistic expectations to a man or relationship.

Oftentimes, when your expectations are broken—through rejection or some other means of disappointment—the result can be very painful.

Your friends and family may likely console you by trying to convince you to move on or insisting that the pain isn’t as intense as you think it is.

But the pain itself isn’t the problem—it’s how you set and deal with your expectations that can lead to a healthy pain or an unhealthy pain.

First, understand that pain can sometimes be a good thing.

All of us experience some degree of pain when we are disappointed—it simply means you are human.

In fact, anyone that doesn’t feel pain after suffering disappointment usually shows signs of numbness that may prevent them from developing a truly healthy relationship in the future.

Therefore, pain is natural, and shouldn’t be discouraged. Instead, we must work to experience a healthy type and level of pain by managing our expectations.

Imagine a situation where you meet an attractive guy, but he never calls you like he indicated he would.

If, during your encounter, you thought he was your soul mate, you would likely be devastated, and unable to move on for some time.

If instead, you set more conservative, realistic expectations—like consciously realizing that if he doesn’t call, it means he may not be your soul mate—you will find yourself in a much better state of mind.

Setting unrealistic or even unattainable expectations on a guy or relationship will set you up for disappointment ever time.

There is no such thing as Mr. Perfect because no man is perfect. Knowing and understanding this will help you accept the reality of a situation much better.

I recently read an article that suggested chick flicks were bad for relationships because they set women up for disappointment. Women watch romance movies and romantic comedies, and they want that kind of guy.

They want the guy who is funny and goofy and makes mistakes, but always finds a romantic way to make up for that mistake. This is the guy who always admits when he is wrong, and he is always willing to display his love for you publicly.

Although you may find a guy who displays these traits, he won’t display all of them all the time. This is an unrealistic expectation.

This particular dating advice for women may not be the easiest to follow. During the honeymoon phase of a relationship, it is often hard not to see your new partner as perfect. However, thinking he is perfect is a mistake and you will be setting him up for failure.

To learn about other dating mistakes you should be mindful to avoid, read The 7 Self-Sabotaging Behaviors That Keep Women From Finding Mr. Right! Click Here to get your copy of this informative ebook.